Jutitsu Wan Kin Off Death Dildo Eggchaku Karate Chopper Flappisakki Kunt Fu Fisting of Fury



Practiced by the Shaolin nuns of Tibet, Jutitsu is the art of tit combat. The nuns develop their jugs over many years until they can manouvre them like a couple of tit like arms. They often hold boob fighting competitions and battle for the coveted Golden Bra of Nippal.


Wan kin Off

The secret of any martial art is to always be prepared, in any situation, at any time... This includes having a tug of the old todge. Wan Kin Off is the art of pressure jizing practiced by the monks of Ming. It involves a technique known as finger over japs eye which allows the monk to build up enough pressure during the vinegar stroke to enable him to jiz a jet of lethal juice.


Death Dildo

Many Oriental women learn to defend themselves using the practiced art of lobbing dildo's. A well practiced dildo lobber can throw with such force that she could kill an attacker from over a hundred feet.



Vibrating love eggs are seen as a simple marital aid which a woman slaps up her cunt to get a cheap thrill. But to the Ninja Warriors missus they double up as a lethal weapon in the art of Eggchaku. When Bruce is away walking through walls and stuff, Mrs Bruce needs to protect herself, so she never goes anywhere without first inserting her lethal love eggs.


Karate Chopper

Your knob isn't just for pissing out of. With practice, will power and self control you can turn your plonker into a dangerous tool. Cock Karate was originally developed as a form of unarmed combat for ninja warriors who lost their arms in battle. Nowadays Cock Karate is more commonly used in martial arts displays. Grand masters use their knobs to crush blocks of ice, smash planks of wood, and fuck large sumo women.



In many Eastern martial arts, the opponent is incapcitated using the pressure point technique. A quick poke in the right place and your assailer hits the deck like a sack of spuds. Flappisakki takes the pressure point technique a step further, when the vibrating fanny is strategically placed on one of the body's many sensitive pressure point's it virtually fucks your opponent into a coma.


Kunt Fu

Orgasms are utilised to their full potential in Kunt Fu. The basics behind this unusual fighting form involves frigging oneself to an orgasmic frenzy then releasing the cum into the face of your opponent. Whilst he is blinded by your excitement you kick fuck out of him.


Fisting of Fury

Probably the best form of defence is attack. If you throw the first blow you are most likely to take an advantage of the situation. The Fisting of Fury, a combat method used by the Bruce's of Lee Monks, uses an attack from behind technique. Wait until your opponent isnt looking, then ram your arm up his arse. The sudden shock should knock him unconcious and allow you to nick his wallet before legging it.

The art of sex 'n' violence was extracted from Smut - The alternative comic
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